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Welcome to The Quirky Canine
Dogs are wonderfully goofy, endlessly individual, and very good at turning a simple question like “What should I feed him?” into a research project.
That is why The Quirky Canine does not start from the idea that there is one perfect food, one perfect feeding style, or one bowl every dog should be eating. My education is in holistic pet nutrition and wellness, and I also use Traditional Chinese Medicine / TCVM principles as part of the way I look at the whole dog. Depending on what you need, that can mean looking at food, treats, supplements, hydration, routine, environment, movement, stress, and the other little patterns that make your dog uniquely yours.
And no, you do not have to throw away the kibble before you come in.
If kibble works for your household, I can help you look at it more thoughtfully from a holistic standpoint. If you want to add fresh food, we can explore that too. My own dogs eat kibble, fresh, and raw because I do not believe there is one-size-fits-all anything when it comes to feeding dogs.
Scroll down, find the level of help that sounds closest to what you need, and we’ll start there.
The Kibble Hacker's Guide - $47
Want to make the bowl a little better without turning dinner into a second job? The Kibble Hacker’s Guide shows you practical ways to look at the kibble you already feed, make smarter choices, and add purposeful fresh foods when they make sense.
No kibble shaming, no dramatic pantry clean-out, and no assumption that everybody has the time, budget, or desire to cook every meal. Just realistic ways to work with what you are already doing and make the bowl a little more intentional.
Tail Talk - $150 per hour
Sometimes you do not need a full program. You have a question about the food you are already feeding, a supplement you are already using, a brand you are considering, an ingredient list that concerns you, or advice from your veterinarian that you want help understanding through a holistic nutrition lens.
That is what Tail Talk is for.
During your Tail Talk, we can talk through what you are currently doing, review commercial foods or supplements you are already using or considering, discuss general nutrition concepts, and help you make sense of conflicting or confusing information.
I can tell you what I like, what gives me pause, what questions I would be asking, and what may be worth discussing further with your veterinarian.
What we are not doing during that hour is creating a new individualized feeding plan for your pet.
I will not tell you exactly what food, protein, fresh ingredients, supplements, or recipe I would recommend for your individual dog without first understanding that dog’s TCVM constitution through the appropriate constitutional service.
Tail Talk helps you better understand and evaluate what you are already doing. The deeper services are where individualized recommendations begin.
The Brand & Bag Investigation - $197
Pet-food packaging tells a beautiful story. The front of the bag has farm fields, happy dogs, rustic kitchens, and occasionally enough leafy vegetables to make you wonder whether somebody accidentally designed a salad.
I turn the bag around.
During a Brand & Bag Investigation, I look at the ingredients, available nutrition information, manufacturing, company transparency, sourcing where it is available, recall history, and the claims being made about the food. Then I explain what I see through my holistic nutrition lens in normal-human language.
You will hear what I like, where I pause, what the available information actually tells us, and what questions I think are worth asking. You will not hear that you are a terrible Pet Parent because your dog eats commercial food.
The point is to help you understand what you are buying so you can decide whether it makes sense for your dog.
The Constitution Kitchen
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Fresh food gets much more personal here.
Before I build individualized fresh-food guidance, I want to understand the dog I am building it for. That means looking at the whole dog, including their history, current food, lifestyle, preferences, energy needs, everyday patterns, and TCVM constitution rather than starting with a generic recipe and hoping it fits.
From there, Constitution Kitchen can include properly portioned recipes and the nutritional additions needed to complete them, along with practical preparation guidance so you know what you are feeding and why.
This is where the individualized food work belongs. It is thoughtful, dog-specific, holistic nutrition guidance — not veterinary diagnosis or medical treatment.
The Constitutional Analysis - $350
Sometimes the bowl is only one piece of the story.
A Constitutional Analysis lets us zoom out and look at your dog through a deeper holistic and TCVM-informed lens. Food still matters, but so can temperament, hydration, routine, movement, environment, stress, seasons, preferences, and the little everyday patterns you keep noticing but have never known whether they belong in the same conversation.
The goal is not to slap a permanent label on your dog or pretend TCVM gives us a magical decoder ring. It gives us another framework for understanding the individual dog and making more thoughtful choices about nutrition and everyday wellness.
You will receive an individualized roadmap explaining the patterns I see and the considerations that make sense to explore for the wonderfully unique dog standing in front of you.
This is also the foundation for the deeper individualized Healthy Tails services.
The 4-Week Transition Partnership - $497
A Constitutional Analysis is required first, because this is where the plan meets real life.
Over four weeks, we begin introducing your dog’s individualized recommendations gradually, watch how things are going, and make practical adjustments as needed. Sometimes the dog has an opinion about an ingredient. Sometimes your schedule has an opinion about my beautifully organized plan. Sometimes what sounded easy on paper becomes much less charming at 6:15 on a Tuesday morning.
That is exactly why this support exists.
We work through the normal transition questions together and build a routine that makes sense for both the dog and the household. If something you tell me sounds medical or belongs with your veterinarian, that is where it goes. Everything else stays focused on putting the nutrition-and-wellness plan into practice without turning your life upside down.
The 3-Month Heritage Partnership - $720
The Heritage Partnership also begins after a Constitutional Analysis, but gives us more time to see what your dog’s plan looks like once the novelty wears off and ordinary life keeps happening.
Over three months, we can notice patterns, refine the nutrition and everyday-wellness pieces, account for seasonal changes, and make sure the plan still makes sense as your dog and your routine move through real life.
The goal is not to create a permanently perfect dog. I do not have one of those either.
The goal is for you to understand your dog’s plan, recognize the patterns that matter, and feel increasingly confident knowing what you can adjust, when it may be time to reassess, and when something belongs back with the veterinary team.